Have you ever read something that fits how you feel so well.
Some men can be so toxic to your health. They don’t want to love you properly, but they don’t want to let you go either. The more you give the less they appreciate, and the minute you’ve had enough and decide to walk away is when they are ready to love you and treat you right. So you give them a chance in the hopes they’ve changed only to realise it was all fake. You find the strength to walk away once more and here he comes again proclaiming his love for you and you give in, AGAIN.
A man showing anger and persistence to get you back once you try to break it of isn’t proof of love; its a knee jerk reaction. A man kissing your ass or making flaccid attempts to be nicer for two weeks isn’t proof that he’s trying, its proof that he knows you well enough to know how to defuse you long enough to hook you once again. Take away a toy, a little boy cries. Take away a relationship of convenience, a man cries. Just because he cries doesn’t mean you give him what he wants.
Stop listening to what your man keeps promising and start watching what his actions actually keep telling you. A lot of you women don’t know what its like to be loved by a real man. You know lust, you know joy, you know passion and you know the fear of abandonment. Stop chasing your idea of what love should be and recognise what love IS.
Love isn’t promising to act right after he gets caught fucking up time and time again. Love is him acting right from the start because he doesn’t want to fuck up. Love isn’t telling your grown man he needs to change so he can keep you; love is a grown man changing on his own because he cant imagine life without you.
(Disclaimer: these aren’t my words. A friend forwarded it to me so I can’t credit the original writer either.)
(now read bottom up, so from the last line back to the top)
Completely unrelated to food but I stumbled across this poem on my newsfeed and just had to share it.
Whether it’s an unrealistic body image we crave or the #lifegoals we see plastered all over Instagram; there’s a point in our lives where we swallow through tough times of self-doubt and inadequacy.
It’s true; We are our own worst enemy and if we listen to our inner critic it can trick us into hiding under a rock and completely stop us from living our lives. That little voice in your head that brings you self-doubt when you need reassurance. That little voice that reminds you of your insecurities when you need to be confident. That little voice that tells you you are not skinny enough, not pretty enough or not smart enough. It’s that voice that sets us back.
The ideal lifestyle, size and image is broadcasted everywhere we look – social media, tv and magazines but we shouldn’t compare ourselves to that. The truth is we will never be that. You are not that person and you won’t ever be able to be that person, because you are you. You offer something someone else can’t, we all have flaws and weaknesses in this funny little life of ours but we work on them and we make ourselves better and we should love ourselves throughout the process. We need to completely curve out the negativity and self hate. We are much more than just our setbacks.
“Turn down the volume of your negative inner voice and create a nurturing inner voice to take it’s place. When you make a mistake, forgive yourself, learn from it, and move on instead of obsessing about it. Equally important, don’t allow anyone else to dwell on your mistakes or shortcomings or to expect perfection from you” – Beverly Engel
Lots of love Hafsah x
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